Shadowheart

…You don’t have to be polite about my religious practices.

[she doesn’t talk about it so openly but she knows it’s not good.]

Theoretically, this is my bond with Lady Shar. She represents darkness, absence, loss. As her acolyte, I am training my mind to be able to embrace her. I surrendered my connections to anything but my faith, I accepted a bond with her that will remind me to turn my mind away from things that would distract me from worshipping her. Truly embracing Lady Shar is not easy. It requires focus, meditation, prayer. These sacrifices are no different than an adherent of another religion taking a vow of poverty, or of celibacy. Once the mind of an acolyte is trained, even the pain itself will be transcended. It won’t hurt anymore.

That’s one theory. The other one is that my memories were taken and this wound induced in me to control me, to keep me from questioning, to keep me compliant and dependent.

[and she’s starting to have a sense of which one she believes is true.]

Still. Either way, there’s no solution to the pain but to endure, and endure it I can.