pc: jiaoqiu

[sacredpath]

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[sacredpath]

I'm glad you're alright. Despite the violence evidently multiplying.

[fried]

[ :ben: ]

Yes, two this time. [ slow exhale. ] I assume the apples were tempting after all. Though if that were the case, I don't know why they'd pick Adolphe.

[ he knows why someone would pick dan so he doesn't bother with that ]

[sacredpath]

[yeah... she wasn't gonna say it but like... it kinda tracks.]

If it was like last week... well, there really seemed to be no rhyme or reason to it being Charlie.

[sorry to keep bringing it up.]

[fried]

That's true. [ he doesn't mind, it's relevant. ] Perhaps we'll hear another person tell us they did it to pass the time in this case, too.

[sacredpath]

Ha.

[not even really a laugh, just a dismissive sound.]

I wouldn't be surprised.

[fried]

I wonder.

[ tilts his head. ] Jing Yuan is known for sleeping in. People have always scolded him for his tired and relaxed nature. It wouldn't be surprising for that to turn to apathy. In fact - he told me he didn't much care about the Xianzhou Alliance, when we spoke.

When I was in that battle with Jing Yuan, this last Sunday, I felt emotions I haven't felt in years. Anger, mostly, towards the end. Extreme anger, and an extreme pride, a reluctance to lose the overrode everything else. I could not stop myself from killing him.

At the time, it felt natural. But now... I wonder - my emotions have been manipulated frequently, here. Could it be that, following our conversation from the other day, Miss Shadowheart - that we are being infected by sinful emotions as sabotage?

[sacredpath]

[oh.... that's a pretty good theory.]

It's certainly a credible notion to me.

[fried]

... If all of this continues to happen, and we are subject to the trial and execution method once again, be careful on that stage.

[sacredpath]

I will be. Though I hope I won't have to experience it.

[fried]

I hope you won't either. I'd hope that nobody would, but I think we're past optimism.

[sacredpath]

I try not to be, as a general rule.

[fried]

Optimistic?

[sacredpath]

Yes, optimistic. It serves well enough.

[fried]

[ he's pretty depressing but this strikes him as sad, honestly ]

Those are the words of someone who has been burned one too many times.

[sacredpath]

...It's what we believe. Even clinging to hope that we know may be false is a distraction. It may protect us from pain for a while, but that protection is also a burden. It is better to embrace the darkness, embrace loss.

[fried]

[ wow, that's something!

his ear flicks. ]

I think our Paths are a little more similar than I thought. [ though - the way he says it, it's not exactly a compliment? just an observation. something a little sad. ]

If THEY cared about anything, I'm sure IX would fit well with your god.

[ general disclaimer that for some reason HSR all-caps pronouns when it comes to gods, and also that IX is pronounced eye-ex ]

[sacredpath]

[well. now she's incredibly curious. even if she chafes a bit at the obvious insight he seems to have, she wants to know what he means by that.]

...Tell me?

[fried]

Of course.

Instead of gods, in the place I come from, there are Aeons. THEY are powerful, godlike higher-dimensional beings who preside over our universe, and over specific paths. IX presides over the path of nihility. THEY believe that the ultimate fate of the multiverse is nothingness, and therefore, worthless.

But THEIR followers often try to find meaning in the nothingness - in the dark, in the pain living beings suffer. I find your god seems to complement this, in a way.

[sacredpath]

That does sound very similar, yes.

[which, wow. makes her uncomfortable. especially "in the pain living beings suffer." Almost like he understands exactly what Sharrans are.]

[fried]

[ sometimes you know things... ]

It's a Path I follow, despite everything.

[sacredpath]

It is?

[oh. because he doesn't seem much like... he should seem.]

[fried]

It is, yes, though not fanatically.

... I find it hard to find meaning in things, but that doesn't mean I'm not looking for it.

[sacredpath]

Maybe it isn't similar after all.

[frowning.]

You don't seem like us.

[fried]

Perhaps not. But it isn't so terrible a way to live, don't you think? Looking for meaning when you're afraid there may be none.

[sacredpath]

[she's not sure how to respond because she's a little trapped. she can't explain that what he's describing isn't what shar is about without acknowledging that a lot of what she said shar is about is the gentle explanation for outsiders.]

...We accept that there is none. Anything else is a comforting lie.