[awww. anyway she will give her a heal! hopefully get rid of the damage. it's just being washed over in some greenish blueish light. it's divine energy so it may feel kind of uncomfortable idk how you want to headcanon it. but anyway, healed.]
I feel worst for you, having to return on your own. At least I could check on the others.
[ honestly it probably does feel weird, but healing is healing!! all her teeth marks fade to scars. i don't even remember her injuries right now i have soup brain ]
It--- probably was for the best, that I wasn't with you all.
[ she went on a mini-rampage ]
But I did worry a lot about all of you. Especially you, I think you were the only one who wasn't possessed.
In a way, I think that was less hard on me. At the time it was awful, but with my memories back... I've always been aware that my friends could transform into monsters.
[hmm. a little twinge of sadness at a memory of being a terrified, inexperienced girl facing all of that.]
It was. But I think what happened to you was more painful, probably? Or at least... [actually, she is aware Charlie doesn't know this.] On the first Thursday journey I went on, Anders and I both were... possessed, maybe, or just manipulated by this monstrous being. I wound up hurting a lot of people in that state.
[so she would have much rather that not have happened to her again.]
[ yeah, that was a lot. charlie feels a lot of guilt, shame, and regretti. there's also pain, because the demon took advantage of her relationship with her absentee mother to manipulate her ]
Oh, I... didn't know that. [ unsurprisingly ] Yeah, I..... that's. Um. Kind of what happened, even when I got back. Luckily, I wasn't in fighting shape after.... well. You know. But I still managed to hurt some people.
You would not have seen, but it was the same for Jiaoqiu and Kaworu. [for her, the people she killed weren't real, but the way she felt while doing it haunted her for a long time.] I don't know if I would have gotten through it if Anders hadn't also been there, and had gone through the same thing. [so it was much harder to specifically blame or hate herself for it when she couldn't hate him for it.]
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week 7, monday
Oh my goodness.... it felt awful not being able to check on you after what happened Thursday. Are you okay?
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I feel worst for you, having to return on your own. At least I could check on the others.
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It--- probably was for the best, that I wasn't with you all.
[ she went on a mini-rampage ]
But I did worry a lot about all of you. Especially you, I think you were the only one who wasn't possessed.
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Still, having that happen before your eyes... it must have been painful.
no subject
It was. But I think what happened to you was more painful, probably? Or at least... [actually, she is aware Charlie doesn't know this.] On the first Thursday journey I went on, Anders and I both were... possessed, maybe, or just manipulated by this monstrous being. I wound up hurting a lot of people in that state.
[so she would have much rather that not have happened to her again.]
no subject
Oh, I... didn't know that. [ unsurprisingly ] Yeah, I..... that's. Um. Kind of what happened, even when I got back. Luckily, I wasn't in fighting shape after.... well. You know. But I still managed to hurt some people.
no subject
You would not have seen, but it was the same for Jiaoqiu and Kaworu. [for her, the people she killed weren't real, but the way she felt while doing it haunted her for a long time.] I don't know if I would have gotten through it if Anders hadn't also been there, and had gone through the same thing. [so it was much harder to specifically blame or hate herself for it when she couldn't hate him for it.]