sacredpath | chrono

... everyone's faith is really admirable. I'm strugglin' with it. It's happened enough to me that I don't trust the process one bit.

[ ... ]

But I can trust the end goal, I guess. Reach for that possibility in any way.

Hearing from it directly from them is what gives me hope. Over there, they seem to believe it will be alright.

They deal with Thursdays like we do, though. It's rough for them too. But... yeah, that has helped a lot.

[ SIGHS. chugs his tea. let's just... put this aside for now. ]

Why'd you change your hair? Not that it's not nice, but it seemed like a big shift.

[oh. this question makes her put her head in her hands.]

Um. It feels stupid, now. I just thought I should make a change.

[ okay, that makes him laugh, but not unkindly. ]

I mean, no time like the present, or whatever! Nothin' wrong with that.

Maybe. [a slight sideways smile at the laugh.] But I feel I was perhaps too optimistic.

...not just a change in aesthetics, then, huh? Because the hair's good, as backed up by nearly everyone else who saw you, too.

You're sweet, but no, I was just - trying to make a clean break from something, I suppose.

[ his ears blend in more with his hair every time she calls him sweet. ]

I know you barely know me, but... can I be rude and ask anyway? No obligation, or anythin'. Just learning about other's perspectives can help with understanding, right?

[hehe cute.]

Yes, alright, cheeky. [she doesn't mean that too seriously, he is not being cheeky.] I've been part of an organization for a long time - a religion, really. We worship a goddess of darkness. But lately I've been wanting, when I return, to make a fresh start and leave that part of my life behind.

A little before my death, I met a woman with very different beliefs than I had, and she made a large impression on me. She had this lovely silver hair, like moonlight. I thought maybe if I saw that hair in the mirror when I looked, it would remind me of the changes I want to make.

[ he listens, attentive, and to his credit does not do more than narrow his eyes slightly at the mention of a god(dess) of darkness. with a hum, he leans back on his hands, head tilted. ]

So it's like... you were trying to realise part of how you want the future to be for you. [ shounen takeaway, painfully sincere. ] Why's that too optimistic?

[he's not wrong, though.]

Ah, it just...seems silly when there's so much going on, you know?

[ shrugs. ]

I don't think so? Maybe it's the best time. Havin' to make a bunch of difficult bad choices, maybe it's good to get a difficult good one squared away, too.

[a small smile.]

Maybe. But I think I may have read a little too much into things.

[ ...heh. ]

We're a bunch of overthinkers, here, seems like. Isn't it okay to just have it at face value?

...Maybe.

[he's right.]

To be honest, I'm feeling foolish because... I didn't realize what this week's special little way of tampering with us was. I started feeling like I'd moved past everything all on my own, only now I realize it's just... this week, and come next week, it will come back.

Oh. The "loss".

[ he'd lost a few things, over the week, but nothing as affecting as what it seems she's going through. ]

That makes sense. Still, it's not foolish to want to find that possibility and hold onto it, no matter if the circumstances made it easier or not. It could be like, the step you made this week'll make it easier to hold on to, next week and beyond. Like it lifted a barrier long enough to let things through.

How did you get to be so wise?

[she's very charmed by all of this sincere advice that she can't help but feel is probably pretty decent.]

I think the answer to that is that I'll try to.

[ he laughs, surprised, a little humbled by the praise. ]

I'm not wise at all. [ he's an idiot. ] Just went through a lot of changes really fast the past couple years. Despite all the shit that happened around them, the fact I'm even here now is only because I could hold on to the good ones, so... it's remembering what it felt like. If it can help at all, great, but I'm really only runnin' my mouth.

[ shounen speeching is an outlet. pretty decent, though, yeah! ]

That's a good answer. You'll work it out.

I still think you're a bit young to have already gone through a lot of changes and come out the other side with a firm sense of who you are. I'm decades older than you are and quite new to this.

[she stands by what she said.]

I had a lot of help. [ he smiles, a little pointedly. ] It's not exactly firm, either. But setting a goal and working towards it, it's harder than it sounds, isn't it? Even findin' that starting point's a whole problem on its own.

Will you tell me about that? The ones who helped you?

[she's curious to know what he means.]

Oh... sure.

[ he's a little surprised, but... he loves his friends. talking about them is no problem. ]

I didn't make friends at all until about three years ago. The ones that I made at first had to stick with me through learnin' how to actually, y'know, be one. [ a light laugh. ] We didn't get along at all at first. Strong personalities that didn't match up. But we stuck through it, and they stayed with me even when my problems became everyone's problems. I was able to get to know others, too. Before I knew it, I was surrounded by people who cared.

[aww.]

I never really had friends, either. Maybe one, when I was very young. But I've been on my own for a long time until very recently.

You wanna share a bit about 'em, too? You've got a lot of friends here, but I'm guessing that's not who you're talkin' about.

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sacredpath - 2025-03-25 01:19 (UTC) - Expand