[it's not hard for her to believe that at all, that's consistent with the marcoh she knows. there was just this other marcoh who was not only dead set on killing but so dead set on it that he seemed ready to turn on any of them violently for trying to interfere.]
Our guiding beliefs and principals aren't the same as what we do when backed into a corner. Nor should they, or else we would have nothing to aspire to.
Still, as much as I understand what you had to do for your sister, I think... the Marcoh I came to know is a gentle person, even if there have been times when it has not been possible to be one.
[ Desire, capacity, and ability aren't always linear. But it's at least a little settling to hear Shadowheart say as much. He can't leap on it for validation but it's a kinder gesture than holding it against him. In the end, he really does think this heaven turned out to be full of kindness. ]
I don't know if that necessarily means I've changed. [ For the sake of redemption and stuff. He still feels mostly the same, very generally speaking... kind of worse if he were honest but that's experiencing trauma for you. ] But if it gets asked, I'll still do what it takes to get it.
As far as I understand, the entire purpose of this project was to allow us to see who we could become removed from the circumstances we were trapped in. I know I've done a great many terrible things, but it did not take much time around people other than Sharrans for that to start to change.
The only problem is that the experiences we had here didn't take us away from those circumstances.
[ He nods... there is mild floating dread here. He did go off the rails spectacularly. Maybe the lesson is if he can bounce back from that surrounded by an actual support system but he's not going to just write excuses for himself. He'll see what comes Judgment Day, try not to be nervous and all. ]
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[it's not hard for her to believe that at all, that's consistent with the marcoh she knows. there was just this other marcoh who was not only dead set on killing but so dead set on it that he seemed ready to turn on any of them violently for trying to interfere.]
Our guiding beliefs and principals aren't the same as what we do when backed into a corner. Nor should they, or else we would have nothing to aspire to.
Still, as much as I understand what you had to do for your sister, I think... the Marcoh I came to know is a gentle person, even if there have been times when it has not been possible to be one.
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I don't know if that necessarily means I've changed. [ For the sake of redemption and stuff. He still feels mostly the same, very generally speaking... kind of worse if he were honest but that's experiencing trauma for you. ] But if it gets asked, I'll still do what it takes to get it.
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The only problem is that the experiences we had here didn't take us away from those circumstances.
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... Thanks for talking to me, Shadowheart.