[she does think he has a backbone. i mean, he told her he died trying to kill one of his friends.]
The Sharrans don't really believe in love. [sorry.] We pledge ourselves to Shar, and consider those sorts of bonds to be a distraction from the greater purpose.
[is she though? the question just makes her look sad.]
I'm not sure it is. Or if it is, that I'm able to. [...] The reason I'm here is because I defied Shar. I became weak to the influence of other people, and I - I wanted to know about my past more than I wanted to follow her command. And I thought she would discard me for what I did, but then there were so many signs that perhaps she hadn't given up on me.
If she sees something in me worth saving after that, it's hard not to think maybe I should try harder.
She's not the only one who can see something in you worth saving. I know you've been dedicated to her your whole life, but... could you not find salvation somewhere else? In someone else? Without having to give up on connections or your answers.
[ his questions are sincere, if concerned. ]
I do think I'm biased. [ he's willing to acknowledge it ] But... I think the choice is ultimately yours, Shadowheart.
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[there's some pretty fucking cursed children in baldur's gate so it's not out of the question.]
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Though I don't know if I've ever met a cursed child.
[ but people make wide leaps and crazy conclusions in this shitty little island ]
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[even if she can understand, she can't agree that it isn't cruel.]
I don't think there's anything frightening about you. Well... perhaps other than how easily you manage to win people over.
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Have I won you over? [ teasing ]
... if people like me, then I'm really happy about it. I decided at some point that I'd try to love everyone, after all. I hope it comes through.
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[she smiles a little, almost amused at that.]
It comes through, but I can't quite imagine that. You can't really love everyone, can you?
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[ he feels like he needs to assert this because everyone talks to him like he has a backbone of wet tissue paper ]
... but I do try. I don't want anyone to believe that they're undeserving of love.
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The Sharrans don't really believe in love. [sorry.] We pledge ourselves to Shar, and consider those sorts of bonds to be a distraction from the greater purpose.
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... can't you just... pledge yourselves to Shar together?
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No. We're meant to reject those sort of attachments, even between one another.
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Are you content with that? I guess it doesn't need to be a focus for everyone...
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[she has to think about it for a moment.]
I haven't always found it easy to follow Shar's commands. Avoiding romantic love isn't the issue, exactly, but I do get attached to people.
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... is it bad if I said that I'm glad you do? Even though I know it might make things harder...
I think it's normal to not want to be alone in life or afterlife.
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But if I want a future serving Lady Shar, I will have to find a way to change that about myself. [that is an if, though.]
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... do you think that's possible? To change that you like people. To change that those people like you, and want you to be happy without sacrifice?
[ maybe shadowheart is stronger than him - well, she definitely is. but... ]
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I'm not sure it is. Or if it is, that I'm able to. [...] The reason I'm here is because I defied Shar. I became weak to the influence of other people, and I - I wanted to know about my past more than I wanted to follow her command. And I thought she would discard me for what I did, but then there were so many signs that perhaps she hadn't given up on me.
If she sees something in me worth saving after that, it's hard not to think maybe I should try harder.
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She's not the only one who can see something in you worth saving. I know you've been dedicated to her your whole life, but... could you not find salvation somewhere else? In someone else? Without having to give up on connections or your answers.
[ his questions are sincere, if concerned. ]
I do think I'm biased. [ he's willing to acknowledge it ] But... I think the choice is ultimately yours, Shadowheart.
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[but it is something she's been thinking about.]
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... it's not a decision you need to make in a day.
But if the thought keeps coming to you... maybe it's worth exploring. And in its place, you can find new connections to fill that spot.